Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Is spinach easy to grow?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

The Director Of Final Fantasy Tactics Gets Political - Kotaku

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know who the president of Turkey really is

How do I rat my boss out for serial cheating on his wife?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I actually pay taxes

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

BlackRock removed from Texas blacklist after climate policy rollback - Financial Times

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Why does everyone hate Anthony Joshua so much? I get that he isn’t the best heavyweight boxer ever but people claim he’s a no skill fighter but he has an Olympic gold medal, a world championship, and beat Klitschko, a dominant force in boxing

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

36 Wildly Entitled People From This Month Who Might As Well Have Just Screamed "It's All About ME!" - BuzzFeed

I have a reading level above third grade

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Market's Slide Broadens in Afternoon Trading - Barron's

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Scientists just learned the age of America's deepest canyon - SFGATE

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Why does an older married man turn bisexual?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

How do the youth in Taiwan perceive their national identity in relation to China?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

How do I study with focus and concentration and avoid distractions and procrastination?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Aussie firms Soul Patts and Brickworks' $9 billion merger sends their shares rocketing - CNBC

I can read

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Why is it common for guys to sleep with 10-20 women then marry a good girl?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I see through liars

Supercomputer simulation reveals how merging neutron stars form black holes and powerful jets - Phys.org

I can count

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

What type of fish is best for fish tacos?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have complete contempt for fakery

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t cotton to rapists